TODAY ON FRANKLY SPEAKING – TRUE HAPPINESS; CAN YOU AFFORD IT? 18-08-2017
counsel delivered to many of us in life,
where in, they sound very good and
appropriate but in reality, it is
impracticable.
I’ve heard many people insist happiness
is a choice, happiness is something you
create by yourself, don’t let anyone upset
you, don’t let anyone get to you, ignore
this; ignore that, don’t let it affect you,
don’t let anyone’s behaviour make you
feel bad or upset, be strong emotionally
and all that.
These advice and counsel sound really
wise but I assure you, it can at times be
unrealistic. You see, human beings are
designed with emotions, we are designed
to feel any and every form of word, act
and attitude directed towards us either
good or bad. The life wire of our co-
existence as mankind is in our ability to
feel one another – our emotions; it is
what empowers us, motivates us, and
inspires most of what we do. We act and
react based on feelings – our emotions.
Even when we choose to be logical, it is
still an emotional decision to get rid of
sentiments. Being objective is the
decision to act outside of our real
feelings in order to achieve a desired
end. Being emotional hence, is basically
being human.
Ladies and gentlemen, when someone
close to you, related to you for instance
your parents, siblings or even your
spouse does something hurtful to you
regularly, it is impossible to be
indifferent, it will definitely get to you,
you can choose not to respond or react
but it will get to you and you’ll become
emotionally worked up.
When you’re cheated, lied to, lied against,
accused wrongly, oppressed, abused or
disrespected, you will feel it, you can
choose not to respond or react in anger
or disapproval, but you will feel it. Not
responding to hurtful treatment is not the
same as not feeling it at all. However,
when you’re consistently treated wrongly
and unfairly, when you’re denied your
right, your entitlement, and benefits, you
will feel it really hard and if all these
persist, you cannot be a truly happy
person.
This simply means it is practically
impossible to create happiness for
yourself in the midst of perpetual pain,
abuse and injustice. You cannot surround
yourself with people that hurt you
regularly and try to create happiness
within it. You cannot remain in a sad
situation and try to create happiness
within sadness.
Happiness is not something you create
by denying the reality of the hurt and
pain you feel. Happiness does not come
by pretending a cause of pain doesn’t
exist, happiness is truly created by
confronting and addressing the pain
factors, situations and people that make
you unhappy.
When the elements change and become
positive, when the people become nicer,
when the factors become favourable,
your happiness then becomes automatic
and realistic.
You can’t confess happiness, you can’t
wish for happiness, you can’t assume
happiness, you must work on the
components responsible for your
emotions for you to enjoy real happiness.
Think with me today, what are those
things or that very thing in your life that
is the source of your unhappiness? Can
you change it, is it possible to change it?
If not, can you detach emotionally from
it?
Ladies and gentlemen, true happiness
does not come by going for happiness
itself. You must work on the components
that can bring you true happiness.
The ability to laugh genuinely in the
midst of painful situations don’t come by
denial but by working on the components
for real happiness. Permit me today
share with you the components you need
to activate in order to be truly happy:
1. A clear conscience. No matter how
much you have, no matter the extent of
your achievement, no matter how famous
and popular you become, if you are
suffering from guilty conscience, you can
never be happy.
When you are guilty of any form of wrong
doing especially against your maker, a
loved one or humanity at large, you can
hardly be happy. The guilt will keep
frustrating your desire and quest for
happiness. When you’ve been mean,
inconsiderate, wicked and treacherous to
other people, your happiness will
naturally disappear. A key component for
true happiness is a clear conscience.
Make that effort today to wright all your
past wrongs and you’ll become happy.
2. Serenity, this is the state of being
calm, peaceful and untroubled. Serenity
is difficult when you’ve sown bad seeds
or carried out evil deeds in time past. In
your mind you’re expecting the
repercussion of your past evil, so with
every situation that appears like your
karma, your calmness and peace
evaporates. If you’ve stolen before, you
believe people will steal from you. If
you’ve badly used someone and broken
that person’s heart before, you believe it
will happen to you or your children.
Serenity can only come through
restitution and spiritual intervention.
Secure the forgiveness of your maker
and that person you offended.
3. Pursuit. Happiness is activated when
you have set goals and you’re doing
something each day that moves you
closer to your dream destination. Without
a vision, dream, obligation and
destination, your life becomes kind of
empty. When you have a pursuit, it brings
excitement and fun into your life, a
critical component for happiness is a
vision to pursue.
4. Healthy Living. Health is wealth they
say. When you live a life with disregard
for your health, you will hardly be happy
when the implications begin to unfold.
When you consume toxic contents, over
eat, become overweight and unhealthy,
you’ll hardly be happy. Healthy living
makes you happy.
5. Love. You need to love someone and
you need love from someone. Love
makes one very happy. We all want to be
loved, encouraged, motivated and
pampered. We want to be cared for,
protected and secured. Unfortunately
many marital and relationship partners
these days are experiencing exploitation
not true love. Almost everything has
become conditional, many earn the
affection, attention, security and care
either with cash or kind. This frustrates
every affair, true love is genuine and
from the heart.
6. Money. Money can actually buy
happiness. When you can pay all your
bills and afford all the good things you
want in life, it will make you happy.
Money is a key component to happiness.
Poverty and insufficiency makes one
afraid, insecure and disrespected. Money
is important in life, money is important to
be happy.
Ladies and gentlemen, if you want to be
happy, it’s not just a mental thing – it’s
not struggling to ignore pain and hurt,
true happiness is the ability to change
your pain factors and create the
components for happiness. Ladies and
gentlemen, be happy.
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